Hi there, Cleanish Squad!
Listen to the audio version of this email here.
Last week, I shared my frustration about the fear-mongering about health and wellness on social media. Many of you replied, agreeing it's getting worse and thankful for the Cleanish approach as a reasonable and achievable lifestyle. (As you can imagine, I immensely enjoyed reading those replies!)
Today, as I near my 42nd birthday on Wednesday in the beautiful Big Bend National Park, I find myself reflecting on my lifelong struggle and now pseudo-attainment with my weight and, ultimately, my confidence.
As you know, I aim to create a world where everyone can enjoy lasting health and well-being without feeling overwhelmed, scared, guilty, or deprived...to enjoy balanced, practical nutrition.
But I wasn't always that way. In fact, I could barely speak up loud enough to order my own food when I was younger! In high school in California, I was shy and quiet, hiding behind a navy blue oversized Patagonia jacket all day long, even in the heat -- it took me living in the Texas heat for 2 years before I finally wore shorts outside in my 30's. Until then, I lived (and hid) in jeans.
For so much of my life, I was uncomfortable in my skin. I always thought it had to do with my weight. But looking back at pictures of me and knowing that I weighed 145 lbs as a 5'7" high schooler, I actually wasn't even overweight! I wasted so much time worrying. Story of my life, really...
In my first year in college, I actually gained quite a bit of weight, going from 145 to 185. Then, in graduate school, I went from 185 to 215.
All the while, I kept hiding.
When Dustin asked me to marry him in 2003, I was finally motivated enough to lose weight. For our wedding in August 2004, I weighed 160 lbs and felt so much better. I knew I wanted to lose more weight, but I was so happy with my progress for the wedding.
I didn't realize it then, but I had started something that would change everything for me. I was slowly becoming the person who could change herself, someone who could choose to improve upon a weakness and become stronger and more confident in herself.
Fast-forward to losing all the weight I sought to lose, having four babies, and keeping that weight off. I started strength training and realized how much stronger I could become, and I continued to stoke the fire below that person who changes herself for the better, day in and day out. I even chose to get tattoos to celebrate my lack of hiding.
This is what I mean by better than yesterday, step by step. We're all on our own journey with choices every day, every minute. With each choice, we have the power to change or stay the same. Heck, by not making a change, we still are making a choice to stay the same.
I share all this with you for two reasons.
One: I forget how far I've come sometimes. I wouldn't say I liked that I was that shy girl who hated herself and constantly wished she could be someone else. But it's important to remember where I came from so I know where to go. It's in the discomfort of change where we grow.
Two. It's never too late to start on the path toward your true potential, the person you want to be. If you've struggled with your weight like I did and feel discouraged, you can make so much change by just getting started and sticking to it, day in and day out. It is 100% possible.
If you struggle with your confidence like I did, I can tell you from my experience that accomplishing your goal of weight loss changes so much more on the inside than on the outside. You'll come out stronger, more confident, and capable of so much more on the other side.
Hopefully, these words reach you if you're struggling or even if you're just getting started. It's not an easy path, but the alternative isn't easy either. It might as well be awesome instead :)
Enjoy the journey,
